We Persevere, We Work Hard, We Seek "Normal."

Yesterday afternoon, Wayne and I left early to go see Frieda. We made a quick stop for a burger to eat during the many stop lights and timed it just right. We were finished by the time we pulled into the hospital. We we arrived, Ms. Frieda was awake and watching tv. Her eyes lit up and I gave her the standard, "Miss me yet?" question. She looked at Wayne, then me, and repeated that several times. We told her we were going to get right to work and get busy and she shook her leg. She was ready for a good rub down and work out.
I worked on Frieda's feet and she loved that. I used a method of body work called Reflexology. There are pros and cons about its
efficacy, but at the end of the day, IT JUST FEELS GOOD!! I do believe that we have pressure points throughout our bodies, and that is why techniques such as accupuncture and accupressure work as they do. Reflexology is essentially the same. You are locating specific pressure points on the foot and pressing or massaging them. While I did that, Wayne worked on Frieda's neck and shoulders. We also took sides and gave her a good lotioning. I took care of her legs, while Wayne got arms and hands. Frieda even good a good head massage!!! By then she was cooing! I even scratched her head all over...sometimes there's nothing that feels better than a good head scratch!
We put Frieda's glasses on so she could see better. We looked at animal pictures and she raised eyebrows at Geordie and Buck. She obviously knew who she was looking at.
There were no tears, no signs of fear, no signs of pain...Frieda was PERFECTLY COMFORTABLE!!! Her eyes were clear and bright, she had no trouble focusing on either of us, looking at us directly in everything we said and answering either with a blink or with a shake of her leg.
I had a heart to heart talk with Frieda about how she feels, frustrations and things like that. It's not rocket science to know that she is frustrated. Yet, the you can literally see those frustrations give way to peace and focus when we get to work. Frieda is not someone who sits back and waits. She likes doing, being busy and having an agenda. She feels much better when doing something and made that clear when we were discussing "frustrations." I say discuss and please understand it's more of a "Q and A." Frieda is not "vocalizing" but that does not mean that she does not COMMUNICATE. There is a huge difference. For example, I reminded her that we have a pact that neither of us will give up because we are not quitters. She was shaking her leg in agreement so hard that it was shaking the bed rails as I was talking. She makes her feelings known. You just have to pay attention and do things (as usual!) ON FRIEDA'S TERMS.
We called Karen while at the hospital. Frieda's eyes grew huge. She was so happy to hear her. She looked directly at the phone and listened intently...shaking her leg when Karen asked questions. She also did her best to speak. She opened her mouth and actually making audible sounds that Karen could hear. Hank also talked to his Aunt Frieda. Frieda's eyes were huge as she listen to Hank tell her about his latest Star Wars Lego set up.
It's GOOD for Frieda to hear about what's normal, what's going on, what's happening. That's what she thrived on anyway...NEWS! So, wouldn't it just make good sense to continue telling her what's going on outside that hospital?
I sure think so. After all, Frieda has given all of her adult life to "news." I'm sure it must be a really bad feeling to "not know" what goes on outside that room.
I try to tell her anything that is newsworthy. I told her that Tony was being all liberal in the paper again and she frowned! I KNEW that would get a fast and easy response from Frieda. I thought that was hysterical...so, there you have it Tony...straight from the boss! Tone it down! It's leaning so far to the left, I'm losing my balance!
This is a slow, slow process Readers. Some of you may have had experiences with stroke, others may not have. I have learned so much about stroke and the effects thereof. I hope that you all will take a few minutes to Google "stroke information" and read what you can. Even though it would appear there is little warning, there are indeed warning signals. Women especially are at risk. There are things to help prevent stroke that are as simple as adding oatmeal to your diet, or of course deleting some things from your diet, walking a few minutes each day, etc.
Don't let this all be in vain. Do read up on strokes and learn what you can. TIME is the most important factor when a stroke occurs. Knowing the warning signs makes ALL the difference in the world. Don't get caught unaware as I did. Hindsight makes things very clear...and knowing what I know now is difficult. There WERE clear warning signs, but I had no idea what I was looking at. No, I stopped feeling guilty, but, I do have an obligation to learn from what I know now and ask you all to be familiar with these signs and signals yourselves. Frieda Hudson and Roberta Caton are not "old women!" Roberta is younger than me...and I'm 45. GET FAMILIAR WITH SIGNS OF STROKE!
On another note, we did talk about Frieda's birthday, Tobacco Road golf course, and many other things of interest to FRIEDA. She was alert and attentive. We met a lady in the hallway who is staying with a relative next door. She said (AS USUAL!!) Frieda is up quite late at night and so she's been going in to her room to visit and talk with Frieda! I appreciated that so much. She lady is from Philly. It's funny at a hospital. You learn to know those folks that "stay there" and you have a sort of community of folks you get to know who are there day and night. Anyway, this gal was so neat and I was so happy to know she's hanging out with Frieda in the wee hours! Frieda I'm sure loves it too.
Time to get about my day. Animals and chores await. Here's hoping you're all enjoying this wonderful weather. Special thanks to Bruce Miller and Joan McClellan for the emails. Both of you lifted our spirts, made us laugh and warmed our hearts.
Till next time...

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