A Water Gun, A Box of Goodies, Fist Bumping and "The Club."

Tonight was a fun night with Frieda. FUN? Yes. Fun. Wayne, Young Nancy and I were with her during the evening. Our friends Martha and Gene Myers sent a box of goodies for Frieda that are wonderful and will help her tremendously in the coming days. It was already suggested by a nurse last week that Frieda needed a "stress ball" when she was clicking the pen and wanting to hold it. Lo and behold! Martha knew just what was needed. She's mostly a miracle worker herself, just so you know. She works with severe and profoundly disabled children and young adults. Many of these people can do little more than blink, yet Martha finds ways to bring even the slightest bit of communication out of them. She has been a wealth of information in terms of what to say to Frieda, how to say things, interact, etc. Her consensus?
BE NORMAL. Read to her. Talk to her. Give her the same courtesy that she had before the stroke occurred. In this box of goodies were charts that Martha had made for Frieda to look at for now, point to when she's ready and enjoy. There is a "magic wand," and you press a button, which makes it light up and make a MAGICAL sound! There was a door bell type thing that she can press a button and call for someone or just play with it, like the wand. Frieda loved those. But, the hit of the evening was not one bit shocking. It was a water gun!!! She grabbed the water gun and we had one laugh after the other as she pointed at me, she pointed it at the nurses, the nurses station, and basically anyone she felt like giving orders to. The night nurse, Jimmi got a point as soon as she came in the room and Frieda was VERY pleased with herself. She grinned and grinned at the whole thing. The nurse went to move the gun to do assessments on Frieda. It was very funny. Frieda frowned at her and moved the water gun RIGHT BACK to where SHE had it laying on her leg. Without words, so much can be conveyed. I am certain Jimmi didn't move the gun again until after Frieda fell asleep. She also wanted the squeeze ball right beside the gun. That's Frieda. She likes her stuff all around her.
Tonight was NOT a "thumbs up" night. Nope. She wasn't interested in that. She was raising her fist and bumping hands. She had a very focused look. Wayne observed it as being "determined." When Jimmi the nurse was working, she said something that meant a lot. She said there was a lot of love in the room. She spoke with Frieda directly. She did not act like one thing was "wrong" at all. Frieda opened her mouth when asked and closed it for taking her temperature. She looked VERY pleased at getting her teeth brushed and her mouth swabbed. I asked her if it felt nice and she made big eyes and nodded yes.
All her vitals looked very good. Jimmi said everything was very stable. At the end of the nurse check-up, she told Frieda she wanted to "be in the club." Frieda grinned a good grin at her and put up her fist to bump hands. Jimmi, Frieda and I bumped hands and Jimmi hugged her for letting her be "in the club." Watching that interaction was great...especially seeing how the nurses speak to Frieda, engage her and treat her with such respect. It was very touching. And that is what Frieda deserves.
Folks who are "in the field" so to speak, that I have talked with have said it is never too soon to start treating her normally, engaging her in conversations, and stimulating "thought." The doctor said she needed to "think about" moving her right arm, etc. Wayne massaged her arm for a while and then put lotion on it and rubbed it in good. She closed her eyes and looked like she was totally enjoying it. Later, I asked her if it felt good and she nodded. It sure looked like it would be very relaxing!
We laughed at Pat Sajak. (Frieda thinks "Wheel of Fortune" is dumb. She has always said that Pat and Vanna irritate her! HA!)
It is indeed frustrating when she's moving her mouth to talk and it's so hard to know what she wants. I just keep asking her questions and see if we connect on anything. Sometimes we do, sometimes we just change the subject to something we KNOW we can do...like "yes" and "no" things. That's just fine.
As you read the blogs, for those of you who don't know me, please understand that I write what I see. I have no reason, wish or desire to proport my visits as "what I want them to be" or "what I wish they were." Frieda Hudson is a determined, strong willed person. She will do this healing in HER own way and in HER own time. I have nothing to gain by sugar coating even one thing. I am still celebrating the fact that Frieda is such a fighter and she is with us. We all asked God to save her...and she is still with us. How dare I question that at all? Nor would I create what is not there.
Frieda is still Frieda...just different. It might take ages and ages, as many have said. I know that. Wayne knows that and I believe FRIEDA knows that.
I also know that what I see is what I see and those are the things I share with you. Nothing more. Nothing less. No sugar coating here.
I can only talk about what I see myself. But, God has allowed these things and every pretend pistol shoot, every squeeze of the ball, every funny look is a blessing. We all prayed for it. We got it and I am so very thankful.
The speech and occupational therapists come tomorrow to discuss their plans how rehabilitation will begin. That will be interesting and so very helpful in terms of what they will want for Frieda. I didn't get to see it, but before we got there, Frieda had actually sat in a chair for a while!! HOW COOL IS THAT??? When I asked her if it was fun, she looked at me like I was stupid. I laughed at that and she had a look that said, "Sure. Doing all that moving around was just a real hoot Anne."
Frieda says LOTS with her eyes. Knowing how much she loves to talk, I can't even fathom what this must be like for her. BUT! I certainly won't question "what is." We didn't want Frieda to leave us. Clearly Frieda wasn't ready and nor was God. All things happen on God's watch, not ours. So, considering where Frieda was versus where she is today, "progress" cannot be denied.
I said this before, but feel it's worth repeating. Even the tiniest of steps are so worth celebrating with and for Frieda. And as I also said before, these posts about Frieda are worth nothing if I felt I had to "make it all sound good" for the public at large. I don't operate that way. Right now, this is how our visits go. Who knows what tomorrow will bring? I just know we accept each day as a gift and one step further away from a very sad and dreary Friday night a couple of weeks ago.
I want to thank you all for loving Frieda enough to read my posts. It was funny to me when I let a couple of days pass last week and didn't post! Boy did the emails start coming again! I had no idea. Now that I know how many of you are reading, keeping up and cheering Frieda on, I'll do this for FRIEDA. I am proud of her progress and yes, it's progress. Everything from this point forward is progress. Keep sending your prayers, support and healing energy. She's soaking it up like a sponge!
And I want to thank you all for the emails you send to me. They offer a great deal of comfort and support. I told Frieda tonight that when she's further along, we will sit down and read each and every one of them together. I know she will love that. The outpouring has been incredible.
With that, a BIG FIST BUMP to you all and a rousting FRIEDA POWER!!! Till next time...

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