Did You Ever Have...

a friend that you knew you could really trust? Did you ever have someone in your life that you knew in your heart truly was there for you and wanted only the best? Did you ever have someone in your life that never judged, only listened and loved?
Well, I can say I do. I can say that Wayne does. In these days and times, "self" seems to be more important than "selfless." But never in the course of our friendship have we experienced anything but "selflessness" from Frieda Hudson.
As I said in a few posts back, I was introduced to Frieda Hudson by Dave Shirk at M&M's on a Sunday evening. Dave told Frieda I was a chatter box...well, I'm also (yes it's true) a bit shy. So, I said very little. She thought I was weird because there was all this hype about me being so talkative, and then I said very little in the moment. But, she didn't judge that. We used to have what I called "Tuesday People" gatherings at Dave and Marsha's house, on Tuesdays of course and if Frieda wasn't too wiped out from publishing the paper, she would always come. She learned there, that her first observance wasn't entirely correct. We have laughed about that OFTEN!
I have to say, however, the first time I saw Frieda, she was doing something she loved...working hard at the paper. I didn't know her at all at the time, we just "figured out" who she was. We had returned to town after evacuating after Hurricane Isabel. We had moved our camper here and were living in it on our land. Not knowing how much water would come in, we made like turtles and headed inland with our camper. When we returned, we drove down to Oriental to see how things were. There was a woman out in front of the Pamlico News, looking rather worn out, kind of dazed and she was pushing a broom on the sidewalk. I remember commenting to Wayne, "That must be Frieda Hudson that runs the paper." We both felt compelled to stop and help her, but thinking that would look strange, we drove on. Later when I told Frieda that story, in perfect Frieda tone, she said, "Thanks a lot. I really appreciate the NON-help." Then she went on about how she didn't care if she knew me or not as long as I was willing to push a broom." Frieda loves to yank my chain. You can bet the next storm of any significance, Wayne and I loaded up a generator and showed up at that newspaper office with wet vac, dehumidifiers, brooms, and whatever else we could throw on the truck. So, did Frieda back up the non-help comment!? NO! She starts PROTESTING! So, we simply ignored her, ignored Mrs. Nancy, laughed at Frieda and told her to leave us alone and we set about getting rid of some water. No, no, Ms. Frieda. Never would I let you hold it over my head that we simply drove by after Isabel! And boy did that feel good to get her back. It's hard, virtually impossible to get "one up" on Frieda Hudson. She keeps me busy trying to out think her!
The "ying and yang" of a friendship like ours is full of surprises. Knowing Frieda Hudson as I do, you can be assured she's anything but "predictable," yet, on the other hand, she is as predictable and solid as the sun rise each day.
Anyone that has come to visit us here in Pamlico County, has always met and fallen in love with Frieda. She would know I had company and show up with food, conversation, and a hand to help out in any way she could. To ask her "not" to is just not an option.
On the Wednesday before her stroke, she called and we were discussing something for dinner. She was coming over. She was going by the Town and Country to get makings for burgers. She shows up with two bags of groceries and a big grin telling me that swiss burgers sounded great to her...I agreed. We make these big, ridiculous "monster Wayne burgers." They are really obscene, but man are they good! Because she ran the errand, I knew I'd have trouble paying her for the groceries she picked up. You can never give Frieda money for ANYTHING. She won't take it and we always get into this big "hurrah" about money. So, I did outsmart her. I said I was going to feed the animals and left she and Wayne to talk. Quietly, I slipped around to the driver's side of her van, PRAYED I didn't set off the alarm and slipped a little cabbage on the dash-catch-all thingy. When Wayne went to pay her, I told him that I had already taken care of it. BIG EARS FRIEDA heard me and started her fussing, promising to start LOCKING her van when she comes over! We laughed and laughed.
When trying to get light to see to put the rope up before she left a couple of weeks ago, Frieda backed into our mailbox.
I get a call just after she left and I wondered what she was calling so quickly for, as she hadn't been gone long at all. "Well," she said, "I was trying to get my headlights positioned right so I could put the rope up and I've hit your mailbox." "If I tore it up, I'll pay for it." I started to laugh and told her that I was sure it would be around $600 or $700 dollars to repair it even if it wasn't destroyed because it was such a special mailbox." At that point, we were off to the races on comedy! Frieda began to tell me how her neck was REALLY hurting after all and she was sure that she had a back injury from it. We must have carried on that routine for twenty minutes, laughing like crazy at each other. That's a friend. Someone you can laugh at, laugh with, care about and share with. That's our Frieda.
I wanted to share a couple of stories with you so that you can remember to care for your friends and family in the same way.
On July 2, 2007, my blog post title was "Life Lessons, the course that never ends." I had no idea just how prophetic that would be. Wayne's accident, Frieda's illness...it's very cliche to say "you never know." But, we don't know. That's precisely why we need to take heed in every moment, every joy and everything that happens in our lives. Because you never know.

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